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Is your son allowed to stay in his comfort zone or are you helping him to grow?

ryan-wexelblatt-ride-the-wave-camp-director

I was really inspired when I saw this guy because he came out of his comfort zone to go surfing at 7:30 AM when the temperature was 29.
 
Frequently, I see parents who don’t push their kids out of their comfort zone. NO ONE grows from staying comfortable, particularly kids with challenges such as ADHD, anxiety, etc. It is essential that they are pushed out of their comfort zone so they can develop independence, build resiliency and social competency.
 
Despite the fact that they know it’s essential, many parents avoid pushing their kids out of their comfort zone. Why?
 
“I don’t have the energy to argue with him, it’s just easier if I do it”.
 
“He gets too nervous and doesn’t know what to say.”
 
“I’ve asked him a million times, he doesn’t do it”.
 
(Unspoken) “Because I need to feel needed as his Mom.”
 
The longer you allow your son to stay in his comfort zone, the longer it will take for him to develop social competency, resiliency and age-expected independence.
 
Your complacency in helping him to stay comfortable may be hindering his ability to reach his full potential.
 
You know your son’s potential, help him reach it. The arguing, complaining, etc. is just “noise”. One day, sooner than later he’ll be grateful that you pushed him out of his comfort zones.
 
Let’s talk about how we can help your son reach his full potential.

Learning skills combined with maturity = progress

When it snows it takes Sasha much longer to do her business. I often get annoyed and try to walk her faster, she digs her heels in and refuses to move when she’s sniffing snow.

Sometimes we (myself included) get impatient with what seems like our kids lack of progress or maturity but they need to grow at their own pace, not ours. I find this is particularly true for a lot of fathers.

Sometimes parents put off getting help for their kids because they hope that they’ll just grow out of their challenges with maturity. While maturity helps maturity does not teach skills & strategies.

If your son has lagging social or executive functioning skills please don’t wait around hoping things will magically get better. While there will be improvement with maturity he also needs to learn practical skills and strategies designed for how his brain learns best.

ADHD combined with learning differences often results in social anxiety

It is very common for boys who have processing difficulties to have social anxiety because they feel like they can’t keep up in conversations. Having ADHD on top of learning differences add another layer of complexity to this.

Many boys with processing difficulties who experience social anxiety are mistakenly placed into social skills groups that do not address social anxiety. Social is anxiety and social learning challenges are two different things. During group this week I gave the guys “homework” which was was to make small talk with someone at their lunch table about the eagles game.

If you’re not sure if your son has social anxiety, social learning challenges or both please set up an appointment so we can figure help him be socially successful.
#socialanxiety #adhd #learningdisabilities